Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
I told a kindergarten student that candy canes are bones of reject elves.
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
Randomize
