wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
Randomize