Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
He said he's going to karaoke tonight and I just spilled a bunch of Cheetos on the floor and ate them all. So that's my night.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
Randomize
