We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
Just realized our kids will one day call us old because we were around when texting came about. I'm sad.
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize
