It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
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