Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
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