he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
Randomize
