Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
I'm upset that MJ died and all but waking up to his face on my HDTV in the middle of the night while half-asleep is pretty much the scariest fucking thing ever.
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Randomize
