brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
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