Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
Winning the lottery was the best thing that ever happened to my penis.
Greatest pickup line ever: "We are out celebrating winning the lottery."
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
Randomize
