I just accidently sent my poop smells like vodka to 27 people in my phone book
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
Randomize
