Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
Randomize
