...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
Randomize