Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
it's not cheating when I paid for it
it's like iHOP with fire
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
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