The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
Randomize
