So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
Randomize
