i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
I was gonna be Romantic and write your name in emoji eggplants but A's are hard
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
Randomize
