I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
Where is the baby squirrel I found last night?! I've looked all morning I can't find Morris anywhere did someone take him?? ðŸ˜ðŸ˜
Honey, I kept trying to tell you it was just a pine cone.
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
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