Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
Randomize