Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
Randomize
