he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
Why is there broken glass in my purse?
You stole a snow globe. From your VP. Soooo...maybe don't put all your hopes on that promotion you were expecting
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
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