i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
It was like giving head to a cactus.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
so much tequila, so little girl.
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
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