Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
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