i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
Randomize