I got into an eating contest with Christina. I ate 6 oranges.
Why? Who won?
we don't know. we ran out of oranges.
Taylor Swift is so right about you.
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
