we have pet lesbian snakes
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
You smell like stripper and shame
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
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