"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
gave myself the "you're a really good girlfriend" talk on the way to where i intentionally cheated on him. i am my own drunken therapist.
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
Randomize
