i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
Next year, please remind me not to be at a damn Super Bowl party with screaming children whose parents can't control them. I will sell the little suckers to the fucking circus passing through town.
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
Randomize
