I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
How's work?
Spinning.
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
