hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
Randomize
