ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
He told me i was the nicest person he's ever arrested for DUI
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
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