my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
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