i don't like sucking hair
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Randomize
