pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
I have feelings that need drinking.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize
