called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
Randomize