So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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