covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
at 4 in the morning i heated a family sized mac n cheese for a minute and decided to eat it frozen cuz I didn't wanna wait for that long
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
Randomize
