i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
Randomize
