Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Randomize
