eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
Randomize
