i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Randomize
