my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Randomize
