You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
