He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
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