I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
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