the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
Randomize
