I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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