how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Randomize