well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
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