Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
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